What Kind Of Mother Are You?

Jack played football this year.  It's the first activity he actually asked for on his own.  He's been loving it.  If I were the kind of mother that I am supposed to be.......there would be pictures to substantiate my claim.  Jack was terribly adorable.  Everytime he made a touch down he would hang his head and pretend it was nothing instead of chest bump and high five.

A few weeks ago The School of Awesomeness (Jack's co-op) had Red Ribbon Week.  Of course Officer Handsome was our guest speaker.  We tried the old....scare em straight strategy.  Only one child confessed to nightmares after, and one refused to participate completely.   The children were whisked off to the land of drug abuse by their fearless leader, where they learned the dangers of meth abuse through pictorial proof provided by a series of mug shots.  Meth makes you look old, dirty and you get lots of red sores!  The treachery of huffing, shown here....

And to really drive it home, the kids wore 'beer goggles', which skew your vision and trick your mind.  It illustrated how your reaction time and balance are changed with alcohol use.

Riley is continuing on with her piano.  She has also been crafting like mad with Duct Tape.  It's been pretty fun.

Mads is in the children's theater play of 'Thumbelina'.  She seems excited.  She's really loved school but finds it a little boring.....which she told her teacher.  The teacher then sent home loads of algebra for her to do HERE.

Max remains shaggy and handsome.  He has no need of preschool because he finds it useless.  He will never know his numbers or letters.  He will grow up to be a wrestler or football player with a small farm on the side and a lovely wife that will do all of his reading for him.

Death Shudder

 Anyone that is left with nothing better to do and is reading this blog......it just had a little death shudder.  Life has been busy and I can't bring myself to log on to my blog.  What with having to put in my password and all, it's quite a chore.  Here are some things that have occurred over the summer.  Mostly this is for my own journaling.  If you happen to read.......please do enjoy.

Above is Jason running the Lunatic Triathalon earlier in the summer.  This is a fun event that happens in our area and takes place at night.  This kids made posters and cheered their dad on.  He had a really great time of 1 hour 8 minutes.....a really great time considering he didn't prepare by doing anything.  Some people have all the luck with their bodies!

 Another fun time was when Jason took the nuggies fishing and hooked his own hand on the way out of the truck.  He stuck it out of course and finished fishing with them before coming home and heading to the ER.  It took quite a bit to numb the old finger.  Then they cut the hook, unwrapped the fly, and pulled the hook out forward.  He didn't even bleed.  They put on a band aid to make themselves feel proficient.  It was a busy night in the ER but since Jason wasn't high on meth we were triaged to the front of the line.

 Piglet finally convinced me to let her cut Rasta hair off.  It was long and gorgeous, but awful to care for!  She donated (or will when I get an envelope) to Locks of Love.

We had a fun time going to Seven Peaks water park, staying in a condo in Park City, going to baseball games, camping, and hiking Timpanogis. Here we are high above the valley.

Mads let me do a photo shoot of her with her hair!   She is so adorable.  This picture should have been with the short hair one........but alas I am not patient enough to go back and put it in the right place.

School just started.  Here are Ri and Mads on the firtst day.  Ri is in 6th.  Mads is in 1st.  They seem to be enjoying it.

This is Jack's first day of co-op.  We are co-opping with 3 other families.  The moms are awesome and the kids are great too.  Jack has really opened up since starting homeschool.  Many people have commented that he is so much happier and approachable.  He is willing to do activities and socialize, which he was not willing to do before.  He will be starting football in a week and seems excited.  He loves school!  What a blessing. 

Anniversary

Fifteen years ago this hunk above cried his eyes out when he saw me.  He will neither confirm nor deny if it was love or horror that brought those tears to the surface.  Yet he has stuck it out.  He always knows just the thing to do.  He truly is my Superman.  I have always been completely taken care of.  He makes me laugh.  He makes me feel safe.  He knows when to joke and when I need serious.  He's always got me covered. He has brought more to my life than I could have ever managed on my own.

Every moment with him has been spectacular because they all add up to now.  And when the last day comes, it will never be enough.  All I will want is another day.  I love you.

What I Learned On Easter........

I know I should be using Easter as a time to blog about the Resurrection and a moment of spiritual enlightenment.  I am kind of sad for myself that this post isn't going to be about that.  Later I will probably have some shame associated with the lost opportunity.

Easter morning, as the sun was rising and I was snuggled in my down comforter on my yummy bed.
 I tried to have a moment of reflection.  I was just getting started considering the massive implications of the Atonement when the kids scuttled in.  Mads and Max got on the bed and wedged between Officer Handsome and I.  Mads pulled out the old 'kitten' routine and started bunting and kissing us and saying, 'Happy Easter!' to everyone.  As she cuddled into the bend of my knees and Max patted my face, Mads (where do things like this come from AT times like these?) blurts.....'I know what Meth is!"  I have a moment where I truly consider that she has learned how to make meth.  It flashes through my brain that she heard about some meth bust on KSL, in which they invariably tell you the ingredients, and she is informing me that by taking battery acid, fertilizer, and comet she can start her own business.  "Um, what Mads?"  (Hear the worry?)  "The Devil's spit!!!"

I am flooded with relief.  When I ask her who the Devil is....considering all of the answers......she falls back on her 2008 presidential campaign propaganda and shouts, "Barack Obama is Satan!"

I Bit The Bullet

     Er, that is a picture that I took while I was waiting to board my ship to paradise....the boarding happened to be much later than expected.
      Something else I didn't really expect.  I pulled Jack out of school.  There wasn't one big reason.  I have wanted to homeschool all of the kids for a long time.  He was being overlooked and not challenged.  And he HATED school.  HATED it.  I felt like I owed him to try something else since four continual years of hating 75% of his day didn't ever make him wake up with a different attitude.  I knew it would be a challenge.  Still...I didn't really expect what I got.
      We quickly formed a sweet little co-op of our own with two other families and two fun mamas.  The kids are pretty awesome and it is nice to have a group for the male child to hang with, especially around holidays.  We meet on a weekly basis and have a fun project which the kids get through with gritted teeth so that they can move on to challenging each other on the Wii (yuck).
     For the first few days while Jack and I were on our own, it was like all of the dreams I had about homeschooling.....except for the missing ten other children and the long farm table.  I tested him out of 3rd grade and moved him on to some other things that didn't glass over his eyes.  He read, he wrote, he did algebra.  And then the honeymoon adjourned rather quickly.  Despite how terrifying and wicked mean I find myself, Jack is not ruffled or intimidated.  I hate it.  If I don't have intimidation I have nothing.  Even love doesn't pack the punch pure meanness does.  Jack and I are a poor personality match.  I pray that someday he finds a girl just like his dad that can put up with the shear amounts of stubborn that spit out of him like lava.  He has yet to actually win one of our scuffles.....but he is getting close.  Ssh don't tell him.  I'll flat out let it be known I dream about starting to drink.
     All of the field trips, organic learning in situation, brain bending science experiments, leading Jack to find internal motivation, and break out literary adventures......they are in the crapper and I am about ready to flush.  I think my expectations were too high.  I think learning is so fun.  I want it to be amazing and exciting.  I think he should pick up on whatever I present him before I am even finished.  I think that I don't want to have to stand behind him with a bull whip and physically press him into doing a teeny weeny bit of work. 
     At this present moment it is 4:38 p.m. mountain standard time.  He has done nothing more than eek out a few words of writing.  He has yet to attempt his math.  He did not read anything.  There was no science experiment.  He did however move all of the chairs from one room to another, make cup upon cup of chocky moomie for Max, play football with Max, make two meals for himself, poke me everytime he walked by, help unload groceries, and explain a movie that I haven't seen.  And still......still! Even though I want to drown myself or put my passport to good use by disappearing.......I STILL think that for right now, this is a better choice for Jack than going to an organized school institution.

#20 Someone You See Yourself Marrying or Being With In the Future

Finally slummin' my way back to the challenge.  And it reminds me that this challenge was probably meant for a 15 year old. 
I'm pretty sure you can guess who I can see myself married to.  I admit I tried to picture myself married to other people but the people in my fantasy weren't smiling.  It's not easy being Peczuh and it takes a real man to voluntarily jump on this train. 
When I was younger I truly believed in 'soul mates'.  I knew there was only one person out there for me.  It seemed so romantic!  And that is how I wanted to see my life.  Years of living have made it pretty obvious that not many things work out that beautifully.  I know that my beloved could have lots of matches out there that would be good for him.  I on the other hand have literallly 0 matches.  I learned this the hard way when my Bobby and I took the eHarmony quiz to see if we were matches.  We weren't.  He had piles and piles of cute girls that were ready for their first 'get to know you' chat.  That's when I nixed his account. I wasn't a match for anyone  for about 5 years, and then there were two guys that were living at home and addicted to gaming.  Obviously even eHarmony had given up on me. 
I tend to be extreme in most areas of my life and eHarmony let me know that not many people can take that.  I love hard.  I cry hard.  I dance hard.  I hate hard.  I believe what I believe with intensity and I don't bend to anyone else very easily.  Now I'm not saying my man is really my little wife.  He doesn't let me run the show, he just knows how to handle with care.
I know my life wouldn't be what it is today without my guy.  I love him.  I try to honor him.  No surprise...I see myself with him in the future.

Is Your Mamma Gonna Miss Ya Now You're Gone?

The incident occured Sunday October 31st around 0530.   The only witnesses to the crime were the handsome couple toodling down I-15.  The children were rendered unconscious from hours of Halloween partying and sugar withdrawl.

Witness statements.....
     Officer Handsome:  I think a jackrabbit just jumped in front of us.
     Lovely Lady:  What the *&^%$#@!  Aahahaha!  Something just flew at us!

Despite the dark nature of the night sky Officer Handsome signals and moves to the right.  Upon reaching the off-ramp he completes his stop and exits the SUV with an LED flash light.  He examines the bloodless carnage and returns to debrief.  Handing over the flashlight to Lovely Lady, he snickers and insists she should find interesting the scene at the front of the vehicle.  With much trepidation and a sense of foreboding, she rounds the SUV and finds herself face to carcass with an extremely large, and quite substantially dead owl.  Having known this is what she would find, she shrieks with pride, "I told you so!".  Then with the fear of God like ice water in her soul.....she runs down the off ramp pawing at the arteries in her own neck and shielding her ears from her own terrified screams.  It appears to be a case of suicide by SUV/Cop.

The body remains afixed with a rigid determination to the front of the vehicle.  Upon reaching Cedar City and the breaking of dawn across the morning sky, they were able to peer into the dead yellow eyes of the owl.  Contemplating removal of the body from the grill, their decision was made by the quickly growing crowd of excited Asian tourists.  The handsome couple were forced to move on with the corpse still firmly implanted, amid the flash of high quality Asain cameras.

The couple made many friends as they crossed Southern Utah, Arizona, the sinful and ugly Nevada, into the unsavory village of Barstow California.  People love to be entertained as they drive the Godforsaken desert.  This day, their dreams were realized.  Many hand gestures, smiles, gasps, and screams were exchanged.  For the few tenderhearted still remaining in the soul parched Nevada, there were tears shed as the owl triumphantly sped at great speeds, past their waning vehicles.

Upon entering Barstow, the town where life no longer has meaning, the handsome couple prepared to lay their new friend to rest.  Lovely Lady retrieved her secret stash of surgical gloves, secreted away in the secret compartment, for a scene such as this that she secretly knew would happen one day.  Pressing them into the caring, yet strong and manly hands of Officer Handsome, she exclaimed, "Don't touch that foulness with your bare hands!"  The bird was swiftly removed with little trouble, despite it's ability to ride the grill through four states.  Pictures were taken to document the momentous occasion.  The bird was toed by Officer Handsome just to be sure no signs of life remained after the arduous journey.  Nope, it was truely dead.  It was time for goodbyes and a few photo ops from the new crowd gathering at the Carl's Jr.  Farewell friend that gave us such memories!  Farewell.