Max's 3rd Birthday

Max opted to spend his day of birth doing testosterone jello shots.  Dada, Dackie, and Coppa took old Maximus out for some four wheeling.  They rode some fun trails all day and stopped for dog food soup (bean and bacon....which in my book smells like a can of Alpo) and a celebratory brownie.  Only one near accident occured when Dada dismounted the four wheeler to open a gate, leaving Max to grab the gas, throttle the heck out of it, and speed off.

The day before the Max's big day, the whole family went to the Gateway.  The kids played in the Olympic Fountain while I melted into a puddle and Superman went looking for cold liquid.

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A Maxism:   A few days before his birthday, Max and I were having a cuddle on the bed.  He'd had enough resting and threw himself knees first into my lower back.  As I blinked back tears and let out wimpers of pain, he said, "Ifs you foe up, cops west you.  (Not a threat at this point....I wouldn't have minded being lead off in a patrol car to my own hard bunk.....with no children to beat me.)"  When I told him I didn't think I was going to throw up anymore he said, "Then you wanna buy new ouse (house)? Beeeooo (blue) or bown (brown)?"  He obviously knows my love of realestate.

It's All Fun And Games Until........

One day Ri and her very goodest friend Regan decided to paint each other's faces.  I don't happen to have a lot of face paint since I have up clowning.  So I pulled out an old tube of lipstick and figured that would do.  Not much later they show up with their faces completely 'Innsbruck Bronze'.   They had begun by only painting certain parts but succumbed to the pull of the lipstick.  The funniest part.......it wouldn't come off.  Soap and water wouldn't cut through it and I didn't want to burn their faces off with any adult facial cleaning products.  We even tried lotion.  We finally settled on some 'Clean and Clear' stuff and then I had to moisturize the heck out of their skin.  They still had sparkle around their hairline and in their EYEBROWS along with a healthy glow on their skin.

I understand the need to take things a little too far......once you start you just can't stop.  I found a razor in the bathtub when I was little.  I felt like I could really make myself into a true beauty.  I shaved some arm hair and then decided........to clean up the eyebrows.  A very short swipe of the razor later......I had no eyebrows.  Unfortunately it took more than a damp rag and powerful acne cleaner to restore me to my former self.  My mother wasn't as easily tricked as I had assumed and realized that there was something severely wrong when I wrapped a scarf around my forehead and assumed a pirate brogue.